watching movies one cup at a time

Welcome to Ice Cubes In My Coffee :: The Caffeinated Movie Guide. I love movies and I have strong opinions about all of them. When they are great, they can change your life. And when they suck, you can at least have fun ripping them to shreds. I have seen a million movies and I have a bunch of movie facts and trivia stored up in my head - it's time to share. I'm going to be filling this movie guide with reviews on an ongoing basis, building up a large library of reviews so YOU, the movie-watching public, will know what movies are essential viewing and what movies you must avoid at all costs (hint: anything with the words "Starring Dane Cook"). I will also be posting some interesting articles and lists along the way as well. So grab a cup of joe and settle in for some movie talk!
      -- Mr. Coffee

Meet The Spartans

Starring: Sean Maguire, Carmen Electra
Director: Jason Friedberg, Aaron Seltzer
Year of Release: 2008
Rated in cups

As bad as you think it is?  It’s worse.

The Mist

Starring: Thomas Jane, Marcia Gay Harden, Laurie Holden
Director: Frank Darabont
Year of Release: 2007
Rated in cups

I’ll warn you up front that there are “spoilers” in this review since people are making a big deal about the ending. If you haven’t seen it and don’t want to know the ending, skip this review until later.

I read “The Mist” when I was in high school and I have always really liked it. I had mixed feelings about a movie version but in general I was pretty excited to see it. We all know how mixed Stephen King movies can be. But one of Frank Darabont’s other Stephen King movies, The Shawshank Redemption, is absolutely brilliant. So the odds were in favor of this one turning out better than most. Read the rest of this entry »

Mr. Magorium’s Wonder Emporium

Starring: Natalie Portman, Dustin Hoffman, Jason Bateman, Zach Mills
Director: Zach Helm
Year of Release: 2007
Rated in cups

In a word: Boring. I feel like the trailer did a bait-and-switch on us. If you watch the trailer for this film, it’s all about magic, bouncy balls, cutesy Natalie Portman, and how wacky everything in the store is. In retrospect there really isn’t much telling you what the actual story of the movie is. And when you watch it, all that wacky stuff from the trailer is in the first 15 minutes. The rest of the movie is Mr. Magorium telling everyone he is going to die, Natalie having a 23 yr. old mid-life crisis, a kid who has no friends, and an accountant who is pretty much there so they can make cliché accountant jokes. And none of it is very interesting. Read the rest of this entry »

The Matrix

Starring: Keanu Reeves, Laurence Fishburne, Carrie-Ann Moss, Hugo Weaving
Director: Wachowskis
Year of Release: 1999
Rated in cups

I remember seeing the first Matrix trailer during the Super Bowl that year. It was pretty minimal. Basically all it consisted of was the line “What Is The Matrix?” accompanied by the now infamous shot of Keanu Reeves bending backwards, dodging bullets in impossible slow motion. But the cultural reaction was immediate. “Did you see that? What the hell IS the Matrix?” The buzz was started. Read the rest of this entry »

Moulin Rouge

Starring: Nicole Kdman, Ewan McGregor, Jim Broadbent, Richard Roxburgh
Director: Baz Luhrman
Year of Release: 2001
Rated in cups

This is the third dazzling film from Australian director, Baz Luhrman. He has a very unique directing style which people either love or hate. It is not generic, it’s not fast food, and it’s not easy-to-ignore. His films are bright, colorful, fast, detailed and full of life. I love them, even tho he has only managed to make three in 15 years. Romeo + Juliet was brilliant and Strictly Ballroom was a great debut already showing a lot of style that would flourish in his next films. Baz’s blended vision of pop culture mixed with old world tradition produces an amazing experience that is very rare in movies these days. It takes you on a wild ride you don’t want to get off. Read the rest of this entry »

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